the scariest thing i have ever experienced;
is being vulnerable to someone else, as i am right now. it's insane how much we open ourselves to others. let them control us in a way. a few words from him could shatter my world, &a few different words can make my heart skip a beat. it's so weird. i love it, but at the same time i'm so scared. things are changing, the way i look at things is changing, the walls are being torn down, &i'm becoming less and less defended every single day. it scares me more than anything else in the world, i can't even explain to you. so, why am i doing it? he's so worth it, so amazing, i love everything about him. that's why. because even if in the end i do end up shattered, it's worth it. my biggest fear is being vulnerable, in any way at all. i'm kind of losing my vision, as in i need glasses, and even though it's not that bad, it scares me so much. i don't like the thought of relying on someone else so much, but that's where trust comes in, right? i do trust him, i'd trust him with my life. &i can't say that for many people anymore, not even most members of my family. i told myself i wasn't gonna do this anymore, no more relationships. but, he just took over. he's always on my mind, no matter what. he gives me butterflies & makes me smile everyday. it's so early, but it's insane how deep these feelings run. i'm falling my friend, falling fast.
♥
i have faith in this.
