i've been so bipolar lately.

i can't stand it, up & down all the time.

&you're right, i'm not myself. because who i am wouldn't deal with it.

... so why am i?

-i know you're lying to me, i just can't call you out on it.

why are you so different from everyone else?

it angers me.

-i can't stand not knowing if you're okay.

i feel my mind slipping out of my grasp. it's so scary.

i've completely given myself up. i don't control anything anymore.

i can only react.

happy mother's day;

hey mom, thanks for not being here for the past 11 years of my life,

really means a lot. ♥

i can't help but to wonder if you care, if you think about us, if you regret it.

i want to think that you do, but everything tells me you don't.

so... why do i care so much?

so, i'm starting a new project.

it involves people & how i really feel about them.

where we are, where we've been, where we're going.

&i might just have to post a few here,

just for the hell of it.

just an update. ♥

before you sit there & blame the fact that we're not working on me, think about why i might not trust you.

it's just fucking creepy & slightly pathetic.

no one pities you anymore, you're the only one holding on, get over it.

really, it's past getting old.

♥